Preparations / Torquart Bay

Friday May 11 – Saturday May 12 — By Saturday the adventurers had gathered in the (for once) fair and dry city of Vancouver. Friday was spent training by specially hired kayak experts. Comrade Aaron was designated Special Ops after rescuing more people than anyone else including Private Dups twice after Dups capsized himself whilst trying to to rescue Dave. Aaron subsequently rescued Dave as well. After an afternoon of frantic shopping, dodgem driving and soulful South Indian curry, the group adjourned to enjoy their last warm, bug free and probably dry night in Vancouver.

10:00 am Saturday — Dups penned a final message to RAGSN HQ and Commanders. Decision was made to chronicle herein.

11am – 5:30pm Saturday — Packing began in earnest. Such essentials as a sock had to be prepared by boiling for a number of hours. This sock will be indispensable as a coffee filter. The “orgasmatron” (a vibrating device to soothe aching muscles) was also carefully debated. Of course we had to make the obligatory trip to the liquor store to stock up on the true essentials of life: a four-litre wine-in-a-box, Guiness, Rum, Vodka and coffee to be filtered through Aaron’s tasty old sock. Packed and music selections made, hasty prayers said: it was time to leave. Off to the ferry to the land of the Nanaimo bars. Chief Navigator’s Jeep led the way.

5:30 – 6:30pm Saturday — All was going well until Chief Navigator decided to enter an unauthorized section of Vancouver city. Even as pedestrians ran out to warn the navigator of the many offences he was breaking, the two vehicles avoided masses of pedestrians, the probability of being arrested and numerous fatalities to make it to the ferry with 5 mins to spare. The journey had begun.

9:30pm Saturday — Picked up two sets of kids walkie-talkies for communication between the cars and kayaks. When pointed in the right direction at an optimal distance of 3 metres and speaking in the correct tone of voice, they actually worked. Major Dave set about learning morse code – unfortunately no one else did.

10pm – 12:30am Saturday/Sunday Morning — Journey to the turnoff to Torquart Bay was uneventful, though a Bob and Doug McKenzie CD was bought from a gas station to bring hilarity to our journey.

12:30am – 3am Sunday Morning — Turned off onto the Torquart Bay road only to discover 16 km of the biggest potholes known to man. While Chief Navigator’s Jeep motored ahead, the Flag Bearer’s Neon swerved through the maze. Expedition leader Haseena joked about the end of this ordeal ending in nothing more than a cliff. Nervous hilarity followed. After three hours the group made it safely, if mentally and physically unbalanced. Tents were set up and off to sleep we went.


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