Karon Beach, Phuket

9am November 28, 2004 Karon Guest House, Karon Beach Phuket

The mere fact that I am making this entry should be indication that we did not infact end up sleeping on a street corner. In fact when the plan finally touched down and Keli found us, we immediately negotiated a room at the cheapest guest house in the book at the tourist counter there. We also negotiated a van to take us to this Karon Guest House (near Kata Noi beach that Eddie Thomas recommended to me).

It was after we got in the van and we drove off that the Asian Taxi Syndrome yet again reared its ugly head.

“Me take you to great hotel!”
“No we have a hotel thank you.”
“500 Baht per room.”
“No, we have a hotel, take us there.”
“Very good rooms…”
“We’ve already [aid for the rooms, we have a booking!”
“Very close to the beach.”
“Take us to Karon Guest House or we get out!” (a very frustrated Keli).
“Oh you already paid and booked….”

The drive through Phuket (Karon is on the southern tip) is unspectacular and long. Chris, Mike and I break out into the Delay-O Song and promptly puts me into tears. In fact we could have been somewhere in Canada, Phuket seems that well-developed.

We arrive at the Karon Guesthouse, unload and are taken to our rooms. I wonder sometimes if we’ve somehow become the playthings for some god out there. When I try to flush the toilet in mine and Chris’ room — no go. I run downstairs and get the receptionist and he fiddles around. Finally there is water flowing. Gives me a sheepish look and says, “No more rooms — all booked up — now good!”

About five minutes later I look in and now our toilet is flooded, water is pouring out of the tank. I run downstairs and get the receptionist and he fiddles and finally water stops flowing. Gives me a sheepish look and says, “No more rooms — all booked up — now good!”

As George Bush says “There’s an old saying in Tennessee ó I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee ó that says, fool me once, shame on ó shame on you. Fool me ó you can’t get fooled again.” (Sigh).

We look at the receptionist and say, “No wait — Try it before you go.” He waits and flushes — no go! He opens the tank and suddenly there is a two-metre geyser erupting from them toilet!

“Wait, I come give you two new rooms with AC.”

So maybe some taxi karma is working for us here. We have two much nicer rooms. Granted Chris and my room has a refridgerator. Shame we can’t find a plug outlet in the room.

All settled, we go to have supper and a few cocktails. As we go down the street in Karon, Thai girls are calling out to us to come inside garishly lit night clubs (mostly lit in pink neon). Obviously sex tourism in Phuket is alive and well. We try cocktails at supper and are bitterly disappointed thought the glasses with breasts makes for interesting suppertime amusements. Oh and Thai wine sucks. Don’t even bother. Really.

Andrew wants to actually make sure that we’re on an island and near a beach. Our scepticism has grown to a new level! Walking down the street we pass the “Gun Club”, “Key Club” and “Jun Club” — I wonder if somewhere here there is a “MUN Club”.

Yes, the beach is there, nice to see rolling waves again. The five newfoundlanders/islanders sit fascinated by the waves for a good half hour. Lightning is flashing on the horizon.

To finish the night we go to a small club called Magic Inn or something, sit on the sidewalk, sing bad eighties music and have cocktails. I show the bartender how to make an Orange Oasis (minus the orange and the oasis). At 2am we head to bed…

Pineapple Waterhole (aka Orange Oasis in Phuket)

1 shot gin
1 shot cherry brandy
1/2 glass pineapple juice
1/2 glass sprite
shaken with ice


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